1/21/2024

the possessed

your story on my bed is my story of you in my bed
and almost mine then, and soon
the blurry border of memory billows
were you mine, was your mind mine
and your heart and my kiss what of those
was fictionless dream
might be dreamless day after dreamless day

what a long night, wasted
help me lie
stay a statue
under the unreal waves
lost, let me wander
the undersea ruins of fantasy
to marvel at all my worthless riches


---


Freezing

Snow dusted, moon eyed
my angel my angel
Death white longing frozen in your eyes
My every breath my every touch
dissolves the icy filigree 
Do you recoil from my kiss
or melt through my fingers 
Who you are is what we have is what I want is disappearing 
Frozen garden on my lips 
Trying to hold you close while holding back the flame inside while holding you afar
hurts
hurts

Hurts
Show me you want my love 
Love like evaporating snow
like evaporating
like evaporating

1/19/2024

focus sleep please

i remember i'm alive when i see you
and i get afraid of death

i wish you could stay here wrapped in my life
happy to be restrained

stillness in love but that's inhuman
we hurt to move

constant gain and constant loss until our final giving
past present future braided too tight

focus focus focus, can't let in
sleep sleep sleep, go away
please please please, come

11/23/2023

the real to the unreal

too hot, on the bed that night
shirts off, in the phantom light
of the city, in this hardened land
skin on skin, under the ceiling fan
   one step forward on the beam of life
then one more, above the pale abyss
and onward, even, kiss for kiss
upon each eye to charm your sight
   i pray, let me enter and cease to be,
take my essence into your life,
be yourself to give birth to me,
use my stillness to ease your strife
   the scene, you on the bed tonight
complete, in the phantom light
of the city, in this fleeting land,
ever holding an empty hand

11/03/2023

k3

Dark home family childhood, My friends and family are my life and my acquaintances are my life, Internal infinite kingdom, Skeleton framework of location/existence comes to--Cellular reds respirating--life 

you can stare and be conquered by the chaos of the peaceful sea

or you can shut your eyes to the watery blaze

and try to submerge the sound of waves

deep in panicked aversion

but still it crashes and crashes and still it crashes it crashes still it crashes still

9/25/2023

lost in the light-dappled darkness 

the striations in the cloud-stricken stars 

scatter a greeting: welcome and goodbye

welcome and goodbye to our ancient future

8/08/2023

(b)(p)(w)(s)

(the point in spacetime when coalescence of self completed)
(inviting many to celebrate, receiving one
decorations and cake
like a slash to the face)
(existent then)
(behold the gift
this necklace of blood crystals
dappled with shimmering teardrops
it dazzles as it chokes)